Thursday, January 10, 2008

Denial

“I like your brother lah, he’s like cool you know”

“Yeah, that’s why I don’t like”

“?? Why?”

“Action, like fake. I’m also a bit like that, that’s why I don’t like myself”

“You noob lah you, you must learn to love yourself”

This is something like what Izso told me. He’d gone to a program where people learn to be a better person. And (I think I’ve posted about this before) people would talk about themselves and later on, whoever likes this person, go to him and tell him the reason, for Izso it was because they liked him because he is expressive(which would be my reason as well :P) and then the next is people who don’t really like would go to him and they would say the same reason also, because he is expressive.

So I told this to my brother which is something similar. My uncle likes him because he is kind of ‘cool’, which I don’t like because I think it’s fake. So for the same reason there are people who like you and people who don’t like you for it.

If you try to please everybody and be accepted by everybody, you’d probably just destroy yourself. Yeah and my brother knows that I don’t like him coz of that haha, but I told him I like him because he’s my brother. 

The problem with me is, I DON’T LIKE a whole lot of people, I am very critical. There are many people who I don’t like, which probable vice versa they won’t like me too.

And at the same time, there are also people who love each and everyone of us (I’m not talking about Jesus or Allah or what). People who love everybody, I envy them, and sometimes it makes me feel sick (I’m immature for thinking this way). I believe this is something I have to learn to do, to love everybody. If I don’t I’d probably end up a lonely and bitter old man.

I deny your love
Because I am selfish
I deny your kindness
Because I am self-centered
I deny you
Because I deny myself.

4 comments:

izso said...

There's no such thing as one person who loves everyone. Flanders from the Simpsons is the eternal optimist. But he hates the Simpsons to hell, just that his religion prohibits him to hate people. What he does is he looks for the positive in the person and focus on that.

It's probably the same as those annoying optimists. They look for the bright side of everything hence they look like they love everyone. When in actual fact they hate your guts. Just that they choose to love your other things more.

Kenneth Tang a.k.a Fishbonezken said...

annoying optimists?....
now you don't like optimists???

better than pessimists right...

izso said...

I don't not like optimists la.. just thoses extreme ones that see the good in everything... even if its really bad.

"God damn! The plague killed everyone in an instant!"

Pessimist : "Fark me.. that's shit bad man. Pity those poor sods who live those areas. They're dead meat!"

Optimist : "Aiya.. at least they're in a better place now..."

kenneth tang said...

ahhahaha, if u put it that way...LoL