yeah so now you can think I'm scum because I've given up. hahaha
I've been doing it wrong because I forgot about the four stages of enlightenment.
words in italic are not my own words.
The first stage is to be a Stream-Winner, where at this stage, his insight is powerful enough to remove the first three fetters, namely:
(1) The belief in the existence of a permanent self;
(2) doubt in the ability of the Triple Gem (the Buddha, Dhamma and Sangha); and
(3) The mistaken belief that moral rules and ascetic rites alone are sufficient to lead a person to Enlightenment.
Asceticism (Greek: askēsis) describes a life-style characterized by abstinence from various sorts of worldly pleasures such as maintaining power (especially sexual activity and consumption of alcohol) often with the aim of pursuing religious and spiritual goals.
A stream-winner, who is at the first stage of the noble path, is not yet free from craving1, ill-will, hatred, ignorance and conceit. However, unwholesome inclinations are not strong enough to lead him or her to kill, steal, or do other immoral deeds. A stream winner is mindful, and mindfulness keeps him or her on guard. The Buddha says, "A stream-winner avoids doing misdeeds that lead him to the lower worlds. Therefore he or she no longer takes life." So you should have confidence in the Buddha and meditate seriously.
When you have made some progress in meditation, you discover what mindfulness means. At the sight of a desirable object, you crave for it, and in the face of something offensive you become averse to it. You are not yet free from these unwholesome emotions, but mindfulness stands you in good stead and helps to restrain them. They lose their power and wither away. They are not out of control, as is the case with most people. They are not strong enough to make a stream-winner do evil.
1 I can watch Grey's anatomy! haha
I still have the first fetter and have to gain more knowledge that. The second, obviously is removed. The third, slowly removing.
The second stage is the Once-Returner. One who reaches this stage has succeeded in weakening the fourth and fifth fetters. These are:
(4) attachment to sensual desire; and
(5) ill will
The third stage is the Non-Returner where he COMPLETELY removes the fourth and fifth fetters.
At the fourth stage, he makes the final advance towards becoming an Arhat (a Perfecte One) who attains Nirvana because he has broken all the ten fetters, the last five which are:
(6) desire for existence in the worlds of Form;
(7) desire for existence in the Formless words;
(9) restlessness: and
Here's an interesting bit.
You may ask what kind of rebirth will take place for the stream winner, the Once-Returner, the Non-Returner and the Arhat?
When a Stream-Winner passed away, he will no longer be reborn in any of the lower realms of existence. He will be reborn in the human or heavenly realms only. It will take him no more than seven rebirths before he attains Nirvana.
When a Once-Returner passed away, he will be reborn only once more as a human being. In that rebirth he would attain Nirvana,
When a Non-Returner passed away, he will no longer be reborn in the human realm; he will be reborn in one of the Pure Abodes in heaven when he will attain Nirvana.
An arhat who has attained Nirvana will not be reborn.
In this life I'm quite sure I can be a Stream-Winner, but a Once-Returner, will probably take lots of meditation, to remove my horni-ness.
Another thing that constantly arises my mind are that when I hear someone is a Christian I look down on them. which is WRONG and should show them compassion like anyone else. Have...to...remove...ill-will....